The Thing About Newspapers…
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Chapter 10 - …. is that most of the time, they suck the money out of your wallet and then the life out of you. Now there is an inspirational thought.
Don’t get me wrong, they do have their place. They have nuggets of useful information here and there, some have pretty good sports sections, they can generally guide you to a new or used car, they make pretty good insulation inside shoes made of inferior leather, and they are terrific for washing windows and soaking up bacon grease. Mmmmmm, bacon (in moderation of course).
I used to subscribe to both my local paper and The Wall Street Journal. Now as the self proclaimed “cheapest man on earth,” you might be wondering why such excess? Well, my local paper was so desperate for circulation; they practically gave it to me for free. And the WSJ? Years ago I worked in advertising at my company and was responsible for its national advertising relationships. As the folks at the WSJ wanted us to buy lots of ads, they saw fit to leave a copy, gratis, at the end of my driveway each morning. Five years or so ago, I woke up and realized my local news paper was a total downer, so I pretty much stopped reading it. But being the lazy sort that I am, I didn’t put a bullet in my subscription. I liked the coupons in the Sunday paper and enjoyed reading the Sunday sports section the day after the Bulldogs played in the fall. But that was about it. Every Tuesday night I found myself hauling myself off the couch and then schlepping about 50 lbs of unread newspaper down to the end of my driveway so the recycling guys could pick it up first thing Wednesday morning. Back then that was about the only exercise I got. Being the compassionate and lazy dude I am, I finally decided that those recycling guys were getting plenty of exercise lifting and tossing all my neighbors tons of paper, so I should cut them a break. I wrote them a note, apologized for saddling them with all those papers and promised to put an end to it. I never got a note back, but am sure they appreciated it. I will say, The Wall Street Journal can be a terrific read, and once you learn how to read it, it can provide all kinds of useful information. A couple of years ago, not too long after I finally figured out how to read it, they finally realized that I really didn’t have anything to do with national advertising anymore, so they cut me off cold turkey. If I were going to subscribe to any paper, it would most certainly be the this link and subscribe, they will pay me something like $2 bucks. If enough folks subscribe, perhaps I will be able to justify paying for a subscription. Shameless plug, I know, but it would be nice to get that subscription again. I do get to see it now and again down at the gym when heat or weather forces me from my outdoor bike to their indoor machine.
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